Regulate your Mind and Body by Paying Attention to All Four Parts of Your Breath

Finding Your Power in the Pause with Breath Retention

Did you know there are four parts to the breath? Most conversations centered around breath are broken into two parts: inhalation and exhalation. The space between the inhales and exhales is equally as important. Without the pause that comes at the top of the inhale and the bottom of the exhale you would be breathing much too fast. Hyperventilation is an example of how breathing looks when the pause is removed.

As you breathe throughout your day this pause is minimal, almost unnoticeable. Every day you breathe in and out over 20,000 times while giving zero thought to the significance. A function of the respiratory system that happens automatically and is vital from your first breath to your last.

Paying Attention to the Pause

The Navy Seals understand the power of the pause probably better than any other organization. They use it as part of their training because it is an optimizing breath practice that helps you stay calm while improving concentration. It’s no surprise this technique is used by a group of high-performance individuals who are known for being put in extremely tense situations. They understand the importance of all four parts of the breath and how it aids in lowering blood pressure. The Seals need to think clearly at all times and slow, stable breaths help them do just that.

Breath retention practices help you focus your attention on the pause both at the top and bottom of your breath. By consciously extending the pause to create a breath hold you bring your attention inward. This concentrated activity focuses the mind intently on what’s happening in the body.

Your breath is your life force, and when you practice breath retention you are cutting off that life force in a controlled manner. Training your autonomic nervous system to stay calm in high-stress situations.

Regulate Your Mind & Body

This incredibly efficient tool not only teaches the nervous system to remain calm, but it also improves concentration as unnecessary mind chatter becomes less important when your breath is on the line. Your mind begins to devote all attention to the activity at hand. When you are practicing a 30-second or one-minute breath hold your mind has only one focus: a desire for breath.

Plus you are training your body to be less reactive to strong needs and desires. Slowing the breath and practicing retention from a controlled space helps you to show up more intentionally. Reminding you how good it feels to be in control. And that nice inhalation of air after a retention hold is the best breath of the day. Energy pulses through the body sending a sense of relief to every cell.

Your breath and your brain are interlinked. One will always follow the other. If you can calm your mind, your breath will follow and if you can calm your breath, the mind will follow. This, of course, works the other way too. If your mind is spinning out of control in rage, lust, or uncertainty, so will the breath. Forcing it to be short and shallow. Moving you into that hyperventilation state where no pause is accounted for.

Practicing breath retentions help us recognize when we are out of balance and guide our mind and body back into regulation.

Box Breathing

Box breathing is my all-time favorite breath practice. It has been the single best practice for me to clear my mind, feel into my body, and find inspiration. It is as simple as it is effective.

Conscious breathing does wonders for our health as the respiratory system is connected to all aspects of the body working properly.

Dedicating time to not only notice your breath but also to pay attention to the pause is incredible healing. It has helped me to see my intrinsic connection to all things as I receive breath, hold breath, offer breath, and am breath.

Simple 5-minute practice

Set a time for 5 minutes
Find a comfortable seat, crisscross or hips to heels on the floor, or if in a chair: move to the edge so your feet are firmly planted and your spine is straight.
Soften your gaze
Bring your attention to your breath.
- Notice where your breath naturally wants to travel
- Allow your body to move gently with the breath
- Guide your breath through your lungs and into your abdomen
Exhale all the air out through pursed lips
Seal off the lips and inhale deeply through the nose filling up your belly, ribcage, and chest as you count to 4.
With your body full of air, hold as you mentally count to 4 again.
Exhale slowly and unrushed as you once again count to 4
At the bottom of the exhale close off the mouth and hold as you count to 4
Inhale and repeat the 4x4x4x4 cycle until the 5-minute alarm sounds.

The first few rounds might feel uneasy or lopsided. But if you stick with it the process begins to be something you can feel. You become calmer and relaxed.

If a 4-count feels easy, count to 5. If it feels tough, count to 3. There is no rule. The best way to begin working with breath retention is to start. Teach yourself how to control your breath. Notice where your breath is traveling. Get curious about what comes up both emotionally and sensationally. These are all clues that will help you better understand yourself and your connection to the world around you.

5 Minutes a Day

Breathwork is a meditation, and in 5 minutes a day, you will set yourself on a path to health, insight, and growth. Breath retention becomes a fun and relaxing activity that you won’t want to miss. You will begin to notice that moment when your inhale becomes an exhale, and when your exhale becomes the wave of the next inhale. There is a powerful connection between your breath and the world around you. If you are looking to deepen your practice and want some guidance along the way, check out my 4-week self-led online course, Breath Mindset, and feel free to leave me a note here as well.

January 24, 2023January 24, 2023

3 Key Qualities You Must Be Willing to Master for Online Business Success

Crafting Your Story, Finding Your Customers, and Bringing Your Business Online

Do you ever feel totally paralyzed by the amount of work it takes to bring your business online? A sea of new customers who you would never have had access to 25 years ago are now all there, online. Now instead of someone finding your local business, you can find them anywhere, but that brings on new challenges. With so many choices you need to craft your story to find your ideal customers. This can feel overwhelming, daunting, and impossible to do.

As someone in her (almost) mid-forties, I find myself struggling with finding my online voice. I see all the gurus telling me why I NEED to buy their products and how they guarantee it will help me…

Find my ideal customer
Grow my mailing list
Attract high-end clients
Make 6-figures in 6 months

This all sounds amazing! But when you boil it down, it’s just good marketing.

I’m not suggesting there is no value in these claims. I want all the information I can to help me bring my small business to a world audience. I’ve bought multiple programs and have gained value from all of them. These online businesses take all the information out there and tie it into a pretty little package for you to take home and have a step-by-step example of how to do whatever it is that they have done.

Totally groovy.

No matter what the course is about I always get stuck on the same thing. It’s like my block. Then I get discouraged and I fall off course. This is what I’ve learned…

It’s never as simple as they suggest
It all takes hard work and commitment
The results highlighted are not typical
YOU MUST BELIEVE YOU ARE WORTHY OF THE REWARD!!!

In every course, workshop, or FREE webinar I’ve signed up for they all say the same thing…

You must believe that it’s possible for you.

Nothing will ever work for you if you don’t believe it’s possible for you.

No matter what you are looking to achieve you must be willing to put in the work, have a clear goal, and see yourself living that life.

Once you start down a path, obstacles are bound to come up. But Obstacles help you get clear about your own vision–obstacles that end up being your biggest resource.

Starting or bringing your business online is the wave of the future, but before you jump in, here are 3 key qualities you must be willing to master to bring you to the forefront of your field.

Know Your Why

What you do is probably not unique to you. What you do is probably something that hundreds of others are pursuing as well. As an online business owner, you must be able to articulate why you are doing business.

Your why is what makes your business different from all the others.

Simon Sinek wrote a book called “Start with Why” and he reminds us to chase the dream, not the competition. This is such a great reminder. When you got into this business you were set on an outcome, not focused on what everyone else was doing. And you are not them, you are you! And people want to buy and work with people like you. People who are relatable to them. This means you have to be able to simply and accurately express your why – why buying a product or service from you is valuable.

The “why” is what made Toms shoes so successful. Not only was his mission clear, but others identified with it and it made them feel good about their purchase. There are hundreds of choices out there when it comes to slip-on shoes, but people buy Toms because it represents something more.

Clear Communication

Communication is key. When you are looking to communicate with your audience it is wise to come from your why. All successful relationships–business and otherwise–need clear communication. It’s so easy to chase the latest trend and get caught up in all the bells and whistles of online marketing. When you do this you are throwing darts while blindfolded.

Who are you talking to? Be clear.

When you talk to everyone you talk to no one.

As an entrepreneur, you must get clear. This will make it easier for you to relay your vision to others, and help you stay focused when the internal and external critics chime in.

Confidence

Self-confidence is so important when you are setting your vision on any big goal because it helps you find your footing during difficult times. Confidence comes from experience and from education.

You must believe in what you are selling. You must believe you are the person to buy from. You must believe that you are making a difference. You must believe in the value of your work or nobody else will.

Being an entrepreneur takes guts. It can leave you feeling vulnerable and exposed. Confidence comes from feeling those feelings and taking the risk anyway. It comes from asking for feedback and adapting to changes when necessary.

You will never succeed if you don’t believe it. No matter how many online courses or books or seminars you attend. You must believe in yourself. Everything else will follow.

I’ve been running my online breath business for just over a year. I don’t think I’d be where I’m at without the resources I got from online gurus. I also know I wouldn’t be here without the local yoga and breathwork classes I teach. All my clients have helped form me into the small business owner I am today.

I have had to adjust, walk away, reform, accept, and make choices based on my wealth of information. I am not where I want to be, and I have a lot of work to do, but I wouldn’t be here without perseverance and knowing that I am helping humanity connect to their greatest resource: their breath.

I am no influencer, but I treat all my clients as though they are the most important client because they are. They are your teachers and will help you become the successful businessperson you have set out to become.

Learn more about my business, Breath Mindset and reach out with your own thoughts. What do you think are the top key qualities for online business success?

January 10, 2023January 10, 2023

Learning to Create Your Own Algorithm Through Visualization

Your Life is a Mirror

What do you see when you look in the mirror? If you’re not mindful of your thoughts you could get stuck in a repetitive cycle of constantly focusing on what you don’t like. Your life mirrors your thoughts, both good and bad, so the question is: Are you happy with the images and thoughts you’re reflecting?

Feeling content and happy with your life comes as a result of where you are putting your focus. I saw a post yesterday from Brendon Burchard, “Something weird I noticed this year: many people are very active every day on social media and replying and commenting to random people, but they won’t return text and voice messages of their real friends and family for days.”

Ouch! How many of us fall into this? Sometimes I find myself so busy building my business and connecting with people that I don’t take the time to check on those I love. It’s easy to mask who we are and get lost online when we do this.

Social media is here to stay and has the potential to blur the mirror of who we really are.

The perfect Instagram life is shallow. A messy reality is deep.

But social media can be helpful in attracting your eye to the things and people who interest you. This all affects your mindset and can help you to develop the vision of your life into a clear path of who you want to be.

Visualization helps us reflect the mirror we seek.

Take a look at your Instagram, Pinterest, or whatever platform you use to express and experience our collective web. The images and products aren’t there by accident. They are an algorithm of your likes, comments, and follows.

It’s easy to see how this mirrors your thoughts, so again, you should ask: Do you like what you see? Is it helping you feel good about yourself and the world around you? Are they bringing you closer to the vision you have for yourself so you can wake up each morning excited about the day?

We are lucky to live in a time when we have so many choices! Achieving big goals and living a life suitable for you is more accessible than ever. Believing that your goals can be a reality for you is as simple as directing your focus on what you want and reaching in that direction.

Simple, yet not always easy.

The easy thing to do is get caught in the self-perpetuating cycle of why certain things and lifestyles are not possible for you.

Focusing on the reasons you haven’t achieved your goals is dangerous because your life is at risk of becoming a mirror that reflects failure, pain, and regret. Then you start attracting more of that into your life and resentment and shame start to show up everywhere.

True desires and feelings will be expressed in positive or negative ways, and it all depends on your focus.

If you find yourself shallow thinking or enviously focused, don’t worry! We’ve all been there.

Turning the mirror from a negative to a positive cycle can start happening the moment you decide your life is worth it.

If you are experiencing a plateau in your life and are feeling stuck, begin by moving your thoughts to what you’d like to see happen instead of what you are currently feeling.

Even in a repetitive cycle of focusing on the negative, there is something to find light in. Something in your life to help you back to a neutral starting point. It might be that you didn’t have to sleep outside in the cold, or that you are able to buy yourself a cup of coffee. Anything! Start there. It’s a practice in gratitude.

If you haven’t had practice in gratitude work it will feel a little bit like you are lying to yourself. But soon you will start to see all that you have to be grateful for, and from this space, the mirror of what you want to see will grow.

Realizing you need work in this space is about developing your mindset, and mindset work is always a worthwhile skill to develop.

Breathwork is my tool for visualizing my own reality and it helps me take back control of where I’m placing my attention and helps redirect me to where I want to go. I do this some days over and over again until I get it.

Learning to Focus Your Breath

I love breath practices because they are so accessible and everyone has the mechanics to start consciously using them to their benefit.

Conscious breathing practices put you in your body, and harness you into the moment. This is a great place to jump into meditation or visualization.

Headphones can be a great ally in this process because here you can focus on your breathing while being led into some deep visualization techniques. There are a ton of great things out there and I am a huge fan of the Calm app because you can find the voices that are best attuned to your frequency. Calm has practices that range from 5-45 minutes in length in making it accessible for your life as well.

When you are ready to get serious about visualization I highly recommend Dr. Joe Dispenza. He has a couple of recordings free on YouTube, but they are only pieces of the pie and only give you a taste of what he offers. His recordings hold a cadence that takes time to feel into but is always worth the ride.

Along with the breathwork and visualization, you can also create something of a vision board to gaze upon. Physically seeing your desires is a great tool and this is how I suggest you set up your social media scrolling. Only bringing in the good you want to reflect out. There is a company called Lifebook that can walk you through all areas of your life and help you create your perfect vision. They have a range of options to help make it accessible, but the guidance is valuable.

There are a ton of online options and you can create your own. Visualization is powerful. And when supported by your breath it can move you into a new reality. Helping you to ask yourself over and over: Am I creating the reality I seek?

January 3, 2023January 3, 2023

Consistency is the Key to Achieving Big Dreams

How a Consistent Routine Has the Power to SkyRocket Your Life

It’s a new year and with that comes new visions and hopes for what the next 12 months will hold. There is a lot of talk about goal-setting and evaluating your progress. Whether or not you are a proponent of this type of resolution thinking, one thing is true for us all…

We must stay consistent in our steps in order to achieve anything.

2023 might be a big year for you. Filled with new relationships, starting that business, or expanding your family. Significant changes change who you are and how you walk through the world. On the other hand, 2023 might be a more consistent year for you; holding steady for your family, or continuing the grind to produce bigger aspirations for your future self. Whichever category you fall into this year the key is to stay consistent.

One Step At A Time

We all talk about big changes and what we will do once we achieve them. But we forget that big changes come from small steps made consistently. Learning how to stay consistent is the discipline that will bring you the success you seek. And consistency is all about finding a routine that works for you.

Consistency helps us focus on the step in front of us rather than the impossible whole that leaves us feeling defeated. Daily focus on your goals is the commitment that helps you achieve them faster.

Easier said than done.

Staying consistent isn’t always easy because starting a new routine isn’t always easy. Some people struggle with routine, so it is vital to create a schedule that you can be consistent with.

Motivation Is Optional

A consistent routine allows us to show up even when we aren’t motivated by the work ahead. Training yourself to be consistent instills self-discipline that keeps you focused on what needs to be done even when you can’t see the forest through the trees.

Motivation isn’t always going to be there no matter what you are working on.

A relationship
Business
Novel
Education
Family obligations

You must learn to show up and give your all even when motivation isn’t coming, and consistency is how you do that. Don’t give up on yourself. Too many people do this because they lose motivation.

The average new year resolution lasts 32 days!

That’s one month people. I spend more time planning a vacation than that. So how come people give up so early on achieving big dreams?

The problem with resolutions is that people are looking for a quick fix most of the time.

Lose weight
Safe money
Start a family
Leave my job

Saying things like these listed above are only statements until a consistent routine of how to make them happen is established.

I heard James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, in an interview. The question he said he is asked all the time is… How long does it take for a habit to form? His response was a hard pill to swallow. He said… If you want to have atomic habits the amount of time it takes to become consistent doesn’t matter. What matters is the commitment to showing up every day for the rest of your life.

If you aren’t seeing progress after 30 days that is normal. Sometimes it takes months before any progress is noticeable. This is why you cannot rely on motivation to see you through. Consistency is the key to any healthy routine.

In 32 days you may learn how to speak a couple words in a new language, but without the consistent effort to practice and learn more about the new language you will stay stuck there and end up walking away because it is too hard.

Follow The Plan

Consistency is good for your mental wellness too. Routine is good for us. Our brains love knowing what is supposed to happen and what is expected of us.

When we know what is expected of us and what steps we need to take in any situation we are less stressed and able to show up more confidently in our experience.

A plan to follow is key, and you get to create that plan by looking at your life and schedule and prioritizing the things, people, and activities that help you build a consistent routine.

The hardest part of any routine is showing up consistently. The second hardest part is taking the time to look at your life and prioritizing your needs. Sometimes taking a hard look at what’s happening in our lives and the things we’ve been avoiding makes us walk away from our lofty goals and dreams.

It’s hard to imagine how we’re going to lose weight when our family time is built around meals.
It’s challenging to find time to practice for that marathon when we work full-time and are running around with the kids’ activities at night
It’s frightening to think about finding romance when you have no idea how to begin looking.

Your Routine

You have a routine that is full of to-dos. Some of them are healthy and some are not. Taking a look at your daily life will help you identify these areas, then it will be up to you to figure out how to deal with them in a healthy way.

This too can be challenging and make us want to give up. But if you do put in the work and prioritize that which is important to you then you will have more energy throughout your day.

Your routine will become automatic. A new habit will be formed and you will show up for it consistently even when the going gets tough.

Once you feel like your new routine is working on auto-pilot you can begin to reflect on how it’s going and where you could use improvements and changes to help keep it fresh and consistent.

Celebrate!

A good way to do this is by celebrating small successes along the way. For instance, celebrate a new habit! Celebrate that consistency with which you are showing up. Doing so will remind you to not throw in the towel after one or two days of set back.

Celebrating your successes is good for your mental well-being and for your self-esteem. Personal growth comes from these consistent habits turned into routine. The consistency that is leading you closer to the path of your dream life.

Celebrating reminds us that we are capable of achieving big things and gives us the confidence to go after more of what we desire.

Ask yourself some questions to get started with a new consistent routine.

Where in my life do I already have a healthy consistent routine?
What are the things about this routine that help keep me consistent with it?
How can I focus more of my attention on achieving my goals?
When am I the most consistent with my time? Morning, afternoon, evening?
Who in my life can I talk to about helping me be more consistent with my goals?

Figure out where in your life you need discipline. Recognize that you are ready to create room for this goa. Realize that it will take work and be ready for those uncomfortable moments when you are eager to walk away.

There are a ton of tools out there designed to help you stay on task and be consistent. I find that everyone I talk to has their own methods that work. Finding your method is essential in the consistency game.

As the new year lies before you with so much potential for growth, I hope you say yes to yourself, and decide to put in the work. You are worthy of greatness. Greatness is within you and all around you. Find something that keeps you consistent on your path and allow this year to unfold one day at a time. Before you know it you will be a living example of your routine and all the more closer to achieving big dreams.

Need help getting started? Check out my 4-week self-guided online course, Breath Mindset.